Melissa & Stephanie: 6,401,482 Californians

We got married on October 2, 2010.  The ceremony was in a friend’s backyard (she also officiated the ceremony) and the party was in San Francisco at the Axis Cafe (  We wanted our wedding to be a celebration of all of the love around us and we did it all with the help of lots of our friends to keep costs down.  When we embarked on the planning of it all, we were determined to do as much as we could on our own.  I, being a crafty girl and Melissa, having an endlessly creative mind started brainstorming. I designed the invitations based on Melissa’s vision and between the two of us, we started thinking of all of our friends and family who could: take amazing pictures, DJ, make tasty flavored treats and a cake out of rice krispies, sew together multicolored fabric flags for the ceremony, do makeup, co-write and officiate our ceremony, make my bouquet, bring props for the photobooth, and anything else that we needed.  Basically our wedding was a community effort.  
This was the first LGBT wedding that probably 95% of our guests had been to so we wanted it to be awesome.  We decided that we wanted our ceremony to feel like it came from us and not some traditional boring stuff.  Melissa wrote “The Story of Us”, a story describing our lives together since we met teaching in 2004 and referenced all the people sitting in front of us as having an effect, and I searched for an alternative, but meaningful reading that subtly addressed the fact that this was not your typical straight wedding.  I wanted my girls to have pinwheels (by rule42 on instead of flowers and Melissa’s girls carried something down the aisle that represented love to us or the person holding it–an apple for teaching, a plant to show that a relationship needs nurturing, a mirror symbolizing how reflection is so key to our relationship, even our ring bearer in a wagon because family is so important and we look forward to starting our own soon.  My favorite part of the ceremony was at the end when our Officiant, Megan said, “By virtue of the authority vested in me by the 6,401,482 Californians who voted against Proposition 8, I now pronounce you partners in life, love and laughter.” A little political jab…Everyone we talk to says that our ceremony was the coolest ceremony they’ve ever been to.  I’m inclined to believe it.

The party was exactly that, a freakin’ awesome party.  We purposely didn’t call it a reception, because we just wanted to party all night.  At the Axis, we had a photobooth, a dance floor, yummy appetizers and lots of love in the room.  

So there you have it.  10-2-10.  Best day of our lives.
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  1. Anonymous
    Posted Mon, Jan 03, 2011 at 8:42 pm | Permalink

    I love this! We can only hope that soon Prop 8 will be officially repealed!
    love you,

  2. Ceremonies by Bethel
    Posted Wed, Jan 05, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    As one of those 6,401,482, glad you celebrated your relationship and didn't wait! And it sounds like a great celebration! Prop 8 will hopefully be gone before long…

  3. McKimmie-Style
    Posted Tue, Feb 01, 2011 at 10:05 pm | Permalink

    I was there and it was indeed amazing! I love you girls with all my heart!

  4. Posted Fri, Nov 28, 2014 at 10:29 am | Permalink

    I don’t know, it seems that this is all in good fun. I really appreciate the humanisation of abstract mathematics in the way Conor does.

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